Baron von Brunk's Website of Justice! The official site of "Baron" Julius von Brunk!

April 2013

April 9th, 2013 - I'm back again, Brunkamaniacs, with some exciting news! Upon the hype and publicity of my giant LEGO NES controller from early January, I've been commissioned by Nintendo of America to create a display for the release of LEGO City Undercover -- thus, a few days ago at the Rockefeller Center, I had my own exhibit!

Who's that handsome devil!?

You can check out the highlights of the event here. Initially I brought a bunch of my LEGO creations to Nintendo World Store, and on Saturday April 6th, I hung out by the upstairs museum and greeted people! Lots of little kids were definitely impressed with my LEGO-building abilities, and many others were flabbergasted with knowing that each particular LEGO model on display was my own original creation.

One new project in particular which was displayed -- from the LEGO of Zelda series -- was my recent Deku Link statue, created just in time for the event:

Unfortunately he doesn't shoot Deku nuts from his mouth like originally planned.

I've also built a motorized Bombchu, which was displayed alongside Deku Link! Trust me, before I put it in the glass case, the employees at Nintendo World Store were in awe upon seeing the little guy coasting. . .

I'm thinking about taking this bad boy to the bowling alley with that cute purple-haired chick.

The aforementioned LEGO models will remain on display at Nintendo World Store until the end of April, and afterwards, some of them might get kept permanently. If you ever plan on visiting New York City, be sure to stop by the store and take a gander at my awesome works!

January 2013

January 1st, 2013 - If you can read this, then congratulations, you've survived the apocalypse (again) and thus have the honor and dubious privilege of gazing upon my latest creations. . .

The giant LEGO NES Controller is completed -- built, electronically-tested, photographed, video-recorded, and ultimately put online for your viewing pleasures!

I'm like, the Leonardo da Vinci of LEGO Bricks. Seriously. (except Raphael was my favorite turtle)

Built by yours truly, and photographed by Gene Kennish, you can check out the whole massive photo shoot here on my Tumblr page! Also be sure to grease up your eyeballs and plunge into the YouTube video as well, in which you get to watch sped-up footage of my playing with this titanic brute of a video game accessory!

Hail to the Baron, baby.

In case you've missed my previous posts on Facebook: I decided that my next wave of LEGO models shall be related to Legend of Zelda - and in doing so, I've created several Zelda-related projects thus far, ultimately leading up to my large model of The Great Deku Tree! Here's some of the assorted Zelda projects I've done previously, but notably my Lake Hylia scientist has gained quite a bit of attention. . .

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

In the world of burlesque, I've done it again for those delightful nerd girls: check out my flier for this weekend's forthcoming New Nerd Review showcase from EPIC WIN Burlesque. . .

The adorable Scarlet Stepford - she's purrrrdy!

I'll more than likely be there; come on down to R-Bar in Bowery (Lower Manhattan) this Saturday! Check out the hot nerdy burlesque, and watch me drink seven glasses of Guinness and stumble my way to Penn Station!

By the way, in my personal life, I've finally gotten an "upgrade" as far as employment goes: I'm no longer a graphic designer for that awful Tzumi company - instead, I'm officially a package and label designer for a major clothing/accessory company in the Garment District - on a temp-to-perm basis! I'm actually working with major licenses and sports teams, hence my days of working in the grueling design trenches have finally paid off. I'm starting off as a contract freelancer with a chance of getting hired on permanently in a few months, hopefully, so we'll see how things go with this new job. Things are picking back up here for me, and hopefully I can move from Queens to Long Island by the spring/summer time. My private death fortress in Great Neck awaits me! I'm just like Jay Gatsby. Think about it. No, really, think about it.

-Baron von Brunk

Octember 2012

Octember 27th, 2012 - Exactly 28 years ago today, a strange demi-god of an unusual size was born in a hospital in the city of Lancaster, Pennsylvania -- he would eventually become a mutton-chopped Amish cowboy capable of building monumental LEGO sculptures themed by Nintendo! For you see, loyal Brunkamaniacs, today is my 28th Annual Birthday Extravaganza of Justice!

On this special occasion, I created a LEGO minifigure for everyone's favorite Canadian pro-wrestler. . . None other than "Rowdy" Roddy Piper!

Fun fact: I saw "They Live" in a revivial theater in Manhattan last winter!

In other LEGO news, I've completed my giant LEGO NES controller -- to some extent.

Like the second Death Star, this battle station is almost fully-operational!

The actual controller itself is done, in terms of physical construction and decoration, however I have yet to complete the electrical wiring and testing. As you know, it's intended to work as a real controller, based on gutting out an old NES controller from eBay, in conjunction with some copper wires and momentary pushbuttons. Once I get this bad boy tested out, I'm going to record a video demonstration of the giant controller in action, along with a detailed photoshoot with my ladyfriend Luna Chase: a sexy geeky cosplayer who does Nintendo-themed burlesque acts! I'm hoping for some time in November to have this all up and running. In the meantime, I have the work-in-progress photos on Facebook as well.

As for the boys and gals of EPIC WIN Burlesque, I'm pleased to showcase my new promo card for their forthcoming Lord of the Rings burlesque show next month!

Hazel Honeysuckle: one dancer to rule them all!

Welp, Halloween is almost among us -- perhaps it's time for me to dig out my X-Wing pilot flightsuit again!

September 2012

September 10th, 2012 - Whovians rejoice! I've finally finished the second phase of my custom Doctor Who LEGO project -- a magic/burlesque stage prop shaped like a TARDIS!

"Doc, are you telling me you built a time machine. . . Out of a pile of LEGO bricks!?"

This is the first custom project of mine to use unconventional LEGO methods such as glue, paint and sanding, as I've typically stuck true to standard building (sans stickers and lights in previous models). To see more photos and get a glimpse of the actual-working beacon on the top, check out the Tumblr entry -- and take a gander at a loving shoutout from my friends at Geeklisted! To see this wonderful TARDIS make its debut, make sure to RSVP to Epic Win Burlesque's forthcoming Sci-Fi TV Burlesque show!

By the way, it brings me sorrow to announce that Reel Splatter Productions didn't make it into the Coney Island 2012 Film Festival. Quite frankly, between you and me and I was kind of hoping we wouldn't get picked -- since being in the film fest would mean having to go back to Coney, and I vowed to never return to that cursed "island" after it caused my ex-girlfriend to leave me a few months back. Screw you Coney Island, you're a dick. Rehoboth Beach is better.

August 2012

August 26th, 2012 - I'm back again, loyal Brunksters! Sorry for the lack of major updates, but things have been hectic and bizarre since last we met. For starters, in my last update I hyped up a major Facebook event involving a LEGO Batmobile build-off. As some of you on Facebook found out, the event was cancelled in light of the tragic shooting massacre in Colorado during the premiere of The Dark Knight Rises. All hope has not been lost, as I should eventually be doing a similar LEGO build-a-thon for Ripley's around Halloween.

Since the cancellation of the build-off, I began working on two massive LEGO models -- one of which is a personal hulking monument, and the other is a custom commission for a customer! Upon cancellation of the build-a-thon, I began to funnel parts and resources into making a gigantic NES controller replica, that's intended to function as a real controller! Check out my Tumblr posts for updates, and be sure to keep track of my Facebook posts! I've obtained thousands of gray and black pieces to construct the frame of this gigantic controller, and with Technic springs, electrical soldering and wiring I've made working buttons. This titanic brute spans across a 5-foot table, stands almost a foot tall. The A & B buttons are almost the size of CDs (sort of - almost).

This thing will be bigger than Jesus. Literally -- I mean, don't archaeologists think he was only like 4 feet?

The second project is kind of secret at the moment, but Nelson Lugo of Epic Win Burlesque has hired me to build for him a large stage prop for a forthcoming Doctor Who burlesque/magic routine! You'll soon discover what the item is after the burlesque show in September - so be sure to RSVP for its event page!

And now, a small personal appeal from me: just last week we heard the awful news involving the cease of publication of Nintendo Power as a magazine. I haven't been a close reader in the past few years since the introduction of Wii, but as a young teen in the heyday of Nintendo 64, I had a subscription and was an avid reader. Nonetheless, I was honored to have been interviewed in the May 2012 issue for my famous Nintendo-LEGO mashups. There might be some light after all, as one of my fans contacted me recently with a proposal for a continuation via petitions and online support. . .

Check out Operation Power Up's Blog, and send your words of support to the Nintendo Power editors.

In the realms of Reel Splatter, we're currently awaiting the results of the picks for the Coney Island Film Festival in September. Tomorrow, August 27th we'll know if the Splatter boys shall stake their claim in New York quasi-history! Keep an eye on the Reel Splatter Facebook page or Twitter to learn the scoop!

P.S. - I'm buying a red van and naming it Ironhide. You heard me.

July 2012

July 17th, 2012 - Brunkamania is running wild, brother! Thanks to the good word of my kemosabe pal Albert Cadabra, the folks at Ripley's Believe it or Not! in Times Square, NYC have commissioned me to do a major geeky performance art event for the public in time for the premiere of The Dark Knight Rises: this Saturday July 21st at noon until next day Sunday, watch me assemble a giant 5-foot Batmobile replica made of over 12,000+ LEGO pieces!

Behold! Baron von Brunk's Batmobile Brick Build-a-Thon Bonanza!

The battest poster yet!

You're not expected to stay there the whole duration, naturally -- er, baturally, but feel free to come on down to Times Square any time Saturday and cheer me on -- and please bring me some pizza and Monster Energy Drinks! The whole gimmick is that I work on this project non-stop with few breaks, until it's ultimately completed and shown on TV! So, RSVP on Facebook and spread the word with your cronies! If not for me, do it for the god damned Batman. . .

To keep me accompanied on this feat, I've compiled a good classic rock playlist mix that is exactly one day in duration (according to iTunes) -- which is the precise amount of time allotted for this challenge. If I make if from AC/DC to Whitesnake upon its completion, I shall have synced everything properly.

When Brunkamania rules! When Brunkamania lives forever! When Brunkamania puts you down on your knees, brother!

By the way, fans of my ever-so-popular LEGO and Zelda tattoos can check out this cool interview with me and Jamila of the Girl Gone Geek Blog for her Tattoo Tuesday feature!

And on the subject of geeky stuff, take a peek at this totally whizzo ad event I created for EPIC WIN Burlesque and their attendance of Nerdapalooza 2012 in Orlando in a few weeks:

I shan't be going to Orlando, Florida to see this, but nonetheless it pleases me to be Epic Win's official graphics guy. Do it for the nerd girls!

July 4th, 2012 - Do you folks like. . . Stickers!?

Mosey on down to my new store page to get your hands on some sticker packs! All you got to do is use the magic of PayPal to select which pack you want, and lo and behold you shall receive a bundle of stickers via the mail!

In LEGO news, I have some exciting new projects: for starters, I completed the next great big LEGOformer -- but not a Nintendobot -- an evil Segacon!

"Gearhead, Supersonic, & Knucklepunch!"

Click here to see the complete photo shoot on Tumblr. Also now available on MOCpages, DeviantArt and Facebook! Fans of Sonic & Knuckles -- or just SEGA fanboys in general shall rejoice at their chance to hog the spotlight for a change!

But back to Nintendo yet again, I've posted a new tutorial on Tumblr which tells how to make a custom LEGO Koopa shell, just like the ones used in my Ludwig von Koopa model:

Don't be throwing any of these at go-karts or anything.

And whilst we're on the subject of LEGO, I have some amazing news about a jolly good whizzo event I'll be partaking in soon: my good buddy Albert Cadabra, a New York City magician and sideshow performer for Ripley's in Times Square has pulled some strings and gotten me a chance to soon have my own performance art event -- which involves me building a giant LEGO sculpture for 24 hours straight, with thousands of of thousands of pieces at my disposal! I shan't reveal more about what my design will be, but let's just say you'll be shocked! Keep checking my Twitter or Facebook pages for updates, and I'll try to keep you loyal Brunkamaniacs posted.

And finally, for those you in the burlesque world, I've gone and made some fancy new promotional material for forthcoming Epic Win Burlesque events! Namely, in two weeks those righteous chaps will be having an X-Men show, in which I created the promo cards!

Storm & Deadpool strut their stuff for our mutated amusements!

Click here for the X-Men event page on Facebook, and if you're in the New York area, you'd be foolish to miss this! For Friday's show, get your tickets here, and go here to get some of Saturday's. There shall be a typical Epic Win raffle, in which yours truly shall donate a prize or two. Or ten. Then while you're here in the city, stick around (a few weeks later -- Saturday, July 28th, actually) for some more curvaceous raunchiness of the nerd kind. . .

"Introducing Red Herring: Canada's Nerdiest Burlesque Star!"

Coming soon is Epic Win's second New Nerdlesque Review, in which the sexiest up-and-coming burlesque starlets get their chance to geekout! I'll be there, so you better be! By the way, if you're truly dazzled by my advertisements, I made a special Facebook album solely for my promotional burlesque material, so check out my totally whizzo talents.

June 3rd, 2012 - Howdy folks! I'm back again with some jolly good designs as well as updates! For starters, in a few weeks the righteous chaps from Epic Win Burlesque are putting on a Harry Potter themed show, in which I had the honors of creating a flier for. . .

(roll your mouse over to see the back!)

We encourage you all to bring a costume, and if you're lucky, the finest cosplay gets a special prize courtesy of yours truly. Also coming up soon is yet another exciting Epic Win show in which I sort of designed a flier for -- albeit Nelson doesn't want to go in the direction of a comic book style cover (as you're about to see), and thus I'm going to create a totally different new approach using photographs of the models themselves, akin to the aforementioned Harry Potter ad. With that said, the below image is a first-run of my original intention of the advertisement, with an early '90s Sega Genesis game art style:

With special guest star Megatron.

Since it shan't be used as an ad, it pleases me to be the creator of Epic Win's first ever fanart!

Update 6/5/2012: I finished the proper version of the ad last night, and here's the event page!

Model: Mary Cyn
Photographer: Burke Heffner
Graphic editing: Baron von Brunk
Evil droid technology: Skynet

Speaking of fanart, I created yet another little graphic based Epic Rap Battles of History, this time a vector t-shirt/sticker design inspired by the Abe Lincoln vs. Chuck Norris battle!

"I am Chuck fuckin' Norris!"

As long as we're talking on the subject of vector art, stickers and t-shirts, let me announce that I've designed a few new print objects to have on sale soon (which were mentioned in the previous update), such as stickers and shirts based on my LEGO/Nintendo mashups. Probably first I'll sell packs of color stickers, and if those sell well, I'll order a few limited quantity shirts to put on my site's inevitable store. Stay tuned, kids!

May 2012

May 13th, 2012 - Remember me as a great designer of t-shirts -- for you see, pretty soon for the first time since 2007, I shall be selling custom merchandise! That's right, folks; some of you older Brunkamaniacs who remember the early days of Baronvonbrunk.com might recall my old store that sold packs of black and white BVB stickers. Times have changed, and now that I'm a successful, refined artist with a real career, I'm launching a new line of custom screen-printed neon t-shirts and stickers featuring self-made vector graphics of my Nintendoformers:

You know you want one. Or two. Or ten.

As mentioned on my Tumblr page, I’m going to splurge the money and get all sorts of extra colors and materials used in these designs — notably the glow-in-the-dark and fluorescent ink! Everything you see that appears to be lime green [on Domaster] shall have a layer of glowing ink over top of it, and everything gray shall possibly have metallic glitter or silver on it. I can’t name a definite date as to when these will be for sale, but probably within the next months or so, and the unit cost will be between $15-25, assuming the production costs aren’t too high. Remember, I’m not out to get rich, I’m out to slap my artwork on the chest of every decent geek in the nation! I'm also trying to partner with local screen printers in New York City to keep everything local, and to put some local artists to work. If you're a screen printer in the five boroughs, definitely contact me and tell me if you can lend a hand with getting these bad boys printed! First things first, though: since stickers are a helluva lot cheaper to get printed en masse, you'll see the them on sale here first before shirts go into production. You could see stickers for sale on this site as early as the beginning of June, so stay tuned and check back for the eventual Store of Justice!

And once again, be sure to support my Game Boy Transformer on CUUSOO. . .

Supporting this project requires absolutely NO money donations whatsoever -- all it takes is simply joining the site (or logging in with Facebook), clicking "support", and leaving the brief feedback! If I can get at least 10,000 supporters, LEGO will personally review this item for being mass-marketed as a real toy for sale, mass produced, legally licensed and all!

Have you picked up the latest May 2012 issue of Nintendo Power? Have you seen my two-page interview in the back!? No!? Then head over to my news page to see some information on it, as well as a special transcript of the original email-based interview between the Nintendo Power editor and me (before it was streamlined for the publication).

May 1st, 2012 - Welcome, fellow Brunkamaniacs, and behold, the new Baronvonbrunk.com! I have lots of exciting news to cue you all in on since we left off previously, so grease up your eyeballs and plunge directly into the world of Brunk!

For starters, the site is obviously now completely redone and much flashier than before. I also got rid of a few sections, added some new things and made everything better than ever, whilst maintaining that typical Brunk charm!

I'd like to brag, if I can: I am featured in the May 2012 issue of Nintendo Power -- that's right, you heard me! Chances are, some of you newer folks found this site through that aforementioned interview, or perhaps you're a regular visitor -- regardless, I never cease to disappoint you; and thank you to all of the fans and little Brunksters who've been supportive over the years! But anyway, my interview chronicles my recent internet exploits of moderate viral fame since the past few months -- which includes (but isn't limited to) my NES Zapper pistol Transformer, the LEGO Mario 3 airship, and finally, the Game Boy Transformer! All three entities have achieved their own respective fame and lit up these internets indeed.

In regards to the Game Boy Transformer, I've received overwhelmingly high demands to publish a custom instructional guide and parts list -- so fear not, folks, for I have the master source online:

View it on Instructables -- with the entire guide, parts list, and links to download the custom Game Boy labels!

And you're interested in potentially seeing this sold in stores? I've got that covered as well! Simply check out the CUUSOO page and support it! Supporting this project requires absolutely NO money donations whatsoever -- all it takes is simply joining the site (or logging in with Facebook), clicking "support", and leaving the brief feedback!

If I can get at least 10,000 supporters, LEGO will personally review this item for being mass-marketed as a real toy for sale, mass produced, legally licensed and all! All it takes is for you to show your support! We've already gotten this far, so now let's work together and make the best from the best!

In other LEGO news, check out my totally badass Super Mario Brothers question block nightlight!

See it on Tumblr, see it on Instructables, see it on MOCpages, and see it on DeviantArt!

Inspired by the lovely geeky burlesque/cosplay girl Luna Chase of New Jersey, this quaint little project is a nifty little item that accents my attic apartment!

All sorts of new little LEGO projects and such have also been added to my respective sites, so head over to my main Tumblr page and pay me some respect! I might just follow back if you're nice enough. . .

Now, here comes the bad news that you might have deduced already: the cartoons page is gone -- dead gone.

"WAAAAAAAAGGGGHHHHH!!!"

To be honest, all of my cartoons were created many years ago when my skills were weak and unrefined, and I had little foresight of my inevitable career as a professional designer -- in other words, everything made between 2005-2009 was for lack of better words, done simply for shits & giggles at the time (e.g. the SPEWOMorg being an inside joke from high school, JSTMK being an abandoned game idea from 2002). All in all, I planned to eventually hone my skills and make a more realistic type of animation in preparation for film festivals. Back in those days, all of my cartoons were done with cheap, simple motion tweens and limited animation, drawn with a mouse and with imports of JPGs and copyrighted characters/music. As of now, I work as a real graphic artist, I own a really spiffy computer, a nice graphics tablet, and I've gotten much better as an all-around designer -- with that said, I plan on making high-quality animated short films (with a style akin to classic Nickelodeon) to market on DVDs and film festivals. I mean, as much as many of you are fans of my work solely because of my early web toons on Newgrounds (from back in '06), you have to realize I can't market DVDs or short films that contain Sephiroth or Ganondorf! From now on, all of my cartoons shall be longer, frame-by-frame (like Disney or Warner Bros.) and using only 100% original characters and music!

However, I did provide a link to one of my most famous cartoons of all time: Masters of Doom - The Animated Series, as it has historical relevancy for both myself, Reel Splatter, John Romero, and David Kushner [the author] -- ergo, a link to a nostalgia article about MODTAS is on the side of this page. There, you'll see the cartoon itself, and you can read briefly about its creation during 2005-06, as well as some info on the book that inspired it. If you'd like to see my toons in their heyday, you'll have to go to Newgrounds.com and search for Baron von Brunk -- and some of you newer fans to whom have only recently found out about me may be shocked as to what you'll see!

As for future cartoons, I'll be collaborating with my childhood best friend Skot Shaub of Testosteroso, and doing some toons of his wacky caliber. To give you an idea as to what's in store: I'll be recycling some various plot synopses of my abandoned cartoons, notably my He-Man spoof featuring baloney sandwiches and bad fast food puns! Other toons will borrow various elements and inside jokes from my childhood, to ensure pure originality, and no more copyrighted characters and/or movie references!

"Don't do it Kevin Bacon. . . IT'S A TRAAAAAAPP!!"

Tell me what you think of my new site renovation! Become a fan of me on Facebook, follow me on Twitter (and I might follow back), and once again, please support my Game Boy Transformer on LEGO CUUSOO!

March 2012

March 13th 2012 - Tell the world the internet belongs to me -- again! First came Plasmashock, the transforming NES Zapper. Then came the hype and excitement of my massive Super Mario 3 airship "The Fireflower!" Now, once again I granted the wishes of every true video game fan and LEGO sculpter alike. . .

Behold!

"Laserbeak -- er, um, I mean Tetrawing, you tinfoil turkey!"

That's right, folks, the newest Transformers/Nintendo/LEGO crossover is here at last, and although just a few mere days old, it's already snowballing rapidly as a viral picture, and gaining plenty of attention across the web! I named this robot Domaster, as an amalgamaton of "Dot Matrix with Stereo Sound", and his avian buddy is called Tetrawing, as coined by New York burlesque girl Dangrr Doll! I spent about a month or so working on these truly geeky robots, and of course the final step was printing the custom water-slide decals for making authentic Nintendo and Game Boy logos. Below are plenty of links to see this bad boy in its entirety:

Due to the overwhelmingly high demand for me to post its instructions, I decided to aid my fellow LEGO craftsmen: this coming weekend, I'm going to record a special video with Mike Lombardo of Reel Splatter Productions in Lancaster, PA -- in which I'll demonstrate its transformation cycles! Afterwards, I'll tear the whole Game Boy robot apart and take photos for instructional references, so that you can make your own versions! Hell, feel free to swap the colors to make a Nintendo "Play It Loud" era colored Game Boy, or even try to follow my example to make a smaller version for a transforming Game Boy Pocket/Color!

March 3rd 2012 - Brunkamania is running wild, brother!

How'd you all like my airship? Did I not dazzle you!? Well, my creative savvy and dedication ultimately caused the project to go viral -- and garnering the attention of some interesting people from CNN to Kotaku to Nice Peter! Check my news page to see some select articles which proudly flaunt my giant ship in all its glory. By the way, the CNN article in particular has the grand interview where I spew off my childhood passion for the Super Mario game franchise. You're bound to shed a tear.

No pesky plumbers can wrestle with this brute.

All in all, the ship's been reblogged hundreds of times from mine and other folks' Tumblr pages. I'm glad everyone enjoyed it, as now I'm pleased to announce my plan to hopefully donate it to the Nintendo World Store in the Rockefeller Plaza in New York. I'm going to be a part of Nintendo history one way or another!

In other LEGO news, I'm almost entirely done building my next Transformers/Nintendo crossover -- a transforming Game Boy with Tetris cartridge! Check out my Instructables page to see what sort of projects I'll be rolling out next.

Last weekend, my good pal Mike Lombardo of Reel Splatter Productions came up to New York to visit me for his 25th birthday, and in doing so, we double-dipped on tickets and caught both shows of the "Adventures of Pete & Pete" reunion at the Bowery Ballroom!

Toby Huss (far right), a.k.a. Artie: The Strongest Man in the World!

The Pete patriarch, Don Wrigley!!

Seeing the cast and creators of one of my favorite childhood shows definitely completed the circle of my nostalgia. Getting tickets for the first show meant succumbing to the wrath of the wretched StubHub scalpers several weeks ago, but when a few tickets remained at the door for show #2, we said "fuck it" and came back a second time! We mingled with all of the original actors/actresses (sans Endless Mike Hellstrom and Nona F. Mecklenberg, as their actors have gone off to major Hollywood/TV roles), got our DVD boxsets autographed and gave our respect to the two creators, Will McRobb and Chris Viscardi! By the way, Syd Straw, a.k.a. Ms. Fingerwood even gave us a free copy of one of her newest CDs! Check here to see a YouTube video of the world premiere live act of little Pete's fictional band "The Blowholes", featuring Marshall Crenshaw on guitar! All in all, things aren't so bad on Bowery.

The next night, we went to the IFC West Village theater and saw a film screening of John Carpenter's "They Live", starring Rowdy Roddy Piper! Unfortunately, the movie ticket didn't include complimentary sunglasses to allow us to see through the subliminal messages. CONSUME. BUY POPCORN FROM THE LOBBY. IFC T-SHIRTS ON SALE DOWNSTAIRS.

Head over to Cracked.com to see some recent Photoplasty victories, notably my winning of three entry slots in the contest titled "Video Games As Understood by Old People", in which I claimed victory for photos #18, #5 and #4!

Is this that "Game Cube" thing you kids wanted for X-Mas?

I can't be the only one who had a totally racist grandpa.

Oh man, I'm funny.

February 2012

February 19th 2012 - The impossible has been proven possible thanks to my dedication, patience, engineering savvy (and disposable income), as I have finally completed my massive 8,000-piece LEGO replica of a Koopa airship from Super Mario Brothers 3 -- "The Fireflower!" Click on the picture below to see the huge Tumblr update, with tons of new photos taken by my friend Roz! Feel free to post links to the airship project on as many blogs as you please, and I'm aiming for maximum exposure!

This ship is bigger than Jesus.

Hopefully we can get this bad boy in a public art exhibit in SoHo soon, as I'd definitely like to show it off as much as possible in public! In other LEGO-related news, I'm in the developmental stages of building a partner for my recent Transformers/Nintendo/LEGO crossover: a transforming GameBoy with a miniature Tetris game that also transforms! The previous NES Zapper robot resembled Megatron or Shockwave, and naturally, this new toy will greatly resemble Soundwave and Laserbeak. Meanwhile, I'm also working on building a stained-glass LEGO lamp of a Super Mario question block, as seen in the photos below:

(although clearly I'm assembling a small legion of Koopa Troopas)

I keep it so real, even my hammers are made of LEGO!

Keep checking back for updates, and feel free to follow me on Twitter or become a fan of my page on Facebook! I welcome all new friends. By the way, I now have a profile on MOCpages as well. I shan't disappoint you, Brunkamaniacs!

In the world of Cracked.com, I've won my share of honorable mentions in various Photoplasties!

"Suck it down!"

"If Tattoos Could Talk"	4th and 5th place
"Smart Phone Apps We'll See in the Future"	2nd place
"When Video Game Characters Finally Snap"	3rd & 16th place
"Painfully Honest Valentine's Day Cards."	7th place
"24 Famous Paintings (with Dialogue Included)"	24th place

In the world of Reel Splatter, I'm pleased to announce Mike Lombardo's victory in getting his short film "Long Pig" a featured movie in the forthcoming Louisville Fright Night Film Festival in Kentucky! Way to go, us!

February 8th 2012 - You wanted some totally whizzo balls-deep updates to the max³!? Look nay further labias and genitals, because I have some jolly good news for the masses!

To begin, let me preface by stating that my recent lack of activity was caused the demise of my laptop's harddrive, which is currently undergoing repairs. Don't worry, loyal Brunkamaniacs: moments before its death, I purchased a new 2TB harddrive and backed up all of my music, drawings, porn and other documents of interest. That being said, I'm currently typing this from my office computer at work.

In the world of LEGO, I have made multiple little projects related to Nintendo -- one of which, my NES Zapper-Transformers crossover has received quite a bit of acclaim on these internets, such as being reposted on dozens of game and geek blogs! Check the news page to see various relevant links to this spiffy little project.

Plasmashock: Heroic Nintendobot, Transforms from NES Zapper pistol to robot and back!

Although in my Tumblr page I clearly state that my next project will be a transforming Nintendo Entertainment System replica (akin to Metroplex or Fortress Maximus), I decided my next model will be a transforming GameBoy that highly resembles Soundwave -- and to answer your question, yes, it shall include a miniature transformer buddy akin to Laserbeak -- that turns into a Tetris cartridge!! I've already put in a few orders for pieces, and hopefully I'll get this bad boy engineered by the end of the month.

In other LEGO news, the airship is done!

Baron von Brunk's got a posse.

Now I'm simply making a final touches such as assembling an interactive display stand and a pixelated backdrop. On 2/18/2012, I'm hiring my ladyfriend Roz to come over and photograph the fully-completed airship and its legion of Koopa Troopa minions, and once the high-res images are taken, I can make cool publicity shots and prints for my eventual public art gallery in SoHo, NY!

And one more Mario diorama for the road:

Green warp pipe, floating blocks, and Bullet Bill in mid-cannon blast!!

In And now for something completely different: At the end of February, my cohort Mike Lombardo and I managed to succumb to vicious ticket scalpers in order to acquire access to the Pete & Pete reunion show in Bowery! That's right, you heard me. We weren't able to scrounge up tickets during the first run, but as soon as they announced a second show, we were quick to snatch up some tickets! That being said, we're going to relive our boyhood glee and see our favorite Nickelodeon actors as older folks! This shall be a night to remember!

Take care for now, kids, and remember: Aim for the head.

-Baron von Brunk

January 2012

January 15th 2012 - Hey kids, I'm back and ready to share some exciting news with the world! In the world of LEGO, I have made numerous modifications and additions to my anticipated LEGO Mario airship!

As you can tell from the above photo, my dirty secret is that I hired plumbers as independent contractors for building my ship, and I ended up using those two brothers! Hopefully they don't sabotage the pipes in the men's room. As of now, I'm awaiting more packages of LEGO parts to finish the ship and its interactive table diorama (containing several Koopa Troopa minifigs)! With any luck, I'll finish building the ship by the end of January, and it's a major possibility that I'll be able to display this bad boy at a public art exhibition in SoHo, NY. First things first, though (aside from actually building this ship) is getting my ladyfriend Roz to lend her assistance as a photographer to take really nice professional pictures of my completed ship in order to make promotional material.

Being able to get a real art show in SoHo of all places is a pretty big fucking deal. I'm serious -- this must be done, people! Keep checking back for updates, and don't be afraid to click on that "like" button atop my Facebook fan page or perhaps the "follow" icon on Twitter to see more information and such for potential gallery dates! Also, here's a sneak peek at another LEGO project of mine. . .

Let's see if you can correctly identify what I'll be building. HINT -- the answer can be found in my DailySingle interview.

In the world of Reel Splatter, our main man Mike Lombardo finally finished and published the heavily-anticipated gory comedy "Long Pig", now online and about to go straight to the film festivals! This movie was filmed on location in my former men's room, back when I lived in that cramped little house in Lancaster City in the summer of 2009! I personally didn't star in this movie, since at the time of its production I was working third shift and therefore unable to stay up and act out any parts. Regardless of my absense, this short film is truly whizzo indeed, and chock full of that sort of splatter-friendly magic you all love!

. . . Can you survive it?

Mike Lombardo even had a special showing of the movie at his house, and to kick it off he personally commissioned me to design a custom 6-foot banner to wave proudly!

These colors don't run -- oh wait; that's specifically what they do.

In other news, take a mosey on over to my news section to see how I placed in a few Cracked.com Photoplasty contests. Not bad, if I must say so myself!

Atticus Finch -- er, um , Dredd is THE LAW!!

For those of you who enjoy my amusing anecdotes and ramblings via my blog, I'm guessing you're wondering why I left off a few months back with some sort of promise of a new entry "one week later" -- when it hasn't been updated since November! Well, as you might be able to guess, as I finished publishing that blog in question (episode 1), I immediately went into production to construct my LEGO Super Mario 3 airship, and have been quite busy with that since then -- in addition to my usual time-consuming career as a graphic designer. However, last month I did in fact deliver a small spoken-word performance about my youthful attempts to build airships! The event took place at the Greenpoint Heights bar in Brooklyn, NY, along with my cohorts Heidi & Bambi Galore. I did manage to use my camera to have my particular speech recorded, but unfortunately the quality is rather bad, ergo I shan't upload it until it's been possibly edited to fix the muffled sound. We're looking forward to doing another show of the "Quest of the Story" -- so once again, fan me or follow me to get a ringside seat for all the updates!

While you're at it, be sure to pay a visit to Epic Win Burlesque, their proprietor Nelson "Charming Trickster" Lugo, and a new sideshow/burlesque venture called "The Sharkbite Sideshow", and do your best to support 'em!

With that said, this February are you ready to get down & nerdy!?

Guess who designed that atomic logo; I'll give you a hint, his name rhymes with Baron von Brunk!

Check out Epic Win & Nelson Lugo's experimental new live event forum, The Spoken Nerd! A truly nerdy event for nerds, by nerds! Head on over to the Facebook event page to get the latest details and such, and make sure to follow all those in charge. The first event kicks off next month, so be sure to RSVP in the earliest stages to get in on the ground floor! Who knows; you might even be able to volunteer to give a lecture at a future event!

Oh, and one last thing before I go back to doing whatever it is I do for a living: I promise (for real for-real) to add a new beard image to my Beard of the Week page -- which apparently should be aptly retitled "Beard of the Month" due to my inactivity. Settle down. Give me a break, Jesse: It's hard to be a graphic designer, a baron, a master craftstman and a gigolo simutaneously -- especially in this busy town. Look, I don't get paid to sit around and take useless photos of my slightly-changing facial hair styles, damn it.